Don't Spend Too Much Time Looking Back

It’s one thing to feel nostalgic and reminisce about wonderful times in the past. Happy memories can serve to remind us that happiness did and does exist for us. But if you begin to cling to old memories, comparing them to the present moment, longing to live in the past, it only darkens the present moment. Don’t spend too much time looking back, because there is so much to look forward to. You might miss it if you dwell in the days that have passed.

In order to find love again after heartbreak, you have to stop looking. You are love, but you’ll never accept that until you understand that YOU are the one. Not them, but you.

And the truth is — whatever we miss most about a person who had left us is almost always the thing that we need to cultivate inside ourselves. The kindness they showed us is the kindness we must learn to show ourselves. The strength that they harnessed is the strength we need to build up on our own. The compassion they share with us is the compassion we must learn to practice, and the emptiness they leave behind is the void that we had to learn to fill without them. Contrary to popular belief, the cure for heartbreak isn’t replacement. It’s growth. Its having the ability to step back from our sadness and understand it’s origins. To decipher precisely where it stems from. And to learn how to incorporate whatever we’re lacking into our day-to-day lives. Because as much as we miss the person - as much as we ache and mourn their absence - we will never miss anyone as much as we miss the versions of ourselves that we became alongside them. The ways in which they made us feel worthy. The insecurities they made us forget. The words we buried deep down inside of us, which their presence passed temporary band-aids on. And as much as their absence may ache, perhaps the silver lining is this - it opens up to the opportunity to understand what exactly it is within ourselves that we still need to work on growing into. Because when someone leaves, they leave a void behind. And we are left with two simple choices: To fill that void with someone new, or to rise to the challenge of filling it up ourselves. The former may feel like the easier move. But the latter will be infinitely more rewarding. At the end of the day, the most rewarding person you will ever get together with after a breakup is yourself. Always remember someone’s effort is a reflection of their interest in you.

Love Yourself